Substitute Bad Words

I am not a potty mouth. On occasion I might drop a naughty word or two, especially when I am a little fired up, but in general, I lean on the conservative side of foul language. 

There was this one time though, when T asked what a certain word meant I almost spit out my imaginary drink. Not knowing what to say, I went with the traditional, "where did you hear that word?" In my head, I was repeating over and over "please say Daddy, please say Daddy." He did not say that though. He said, "When we were driving the other day on that road with all the cars, that big truck came in front of you and you slammed on breaks and said, 'what the $#%^!' Then you pulled over and checked on me but I was fine." 

First of all, no parent wants to hear their child say that word. Second of all, no mommy wants to hear they are the background knowledge for such words. Third of all, well, it is what it is. (Pretty sure I need that on a shirt!) We had a talk about word choice, not the 6 Traits kind, and moved on with our lives.

After all these years of priding myself on saying things like, "Oh spaghettios!" or one I stole from my friend Aimee, "Frickity, frack!" Then there's "ding dang diggy" and my all time favorite, "banana yogurt!" Try saying that last one in a really aggravated tone. It is healing, I tell you. All for not, I learned though, all for not. They catch them all. Kids have little microphones with recording devices in their heads. The setting is set to "things you shouldn't hear" and the files are saved accordingly. 

This ended up being a great conversation with other friends who shared their substitute bad words, too. Some say oh ship! Others say things like what the frog and one clever friend says FOGGGG  on days that aren't so foggy. 

Do you have a substitute bad word? Come on, tell us, we won't record it and hold it against you later, I promise!